Personal Eye View
Sunday, June 26, 2005
  All the memories came back.
Have you ever visited somewhere where you used to live and been emotional about it?
That's what happened to me today, when I went for lunch at my Auntie's house in Codicote near where my Dad lives, and wanted to go for a walk after lunch to see the village and see the places I used to go when my family lived there. Anyway, went for a walk around Codicote looking at the places and as I was walking around I felt sad about it because there were all the places I visited when I was little like the big recreation ground behind the Costcutter, and the lovely barn house I liked in Farrier's Close, and the gorgeous little newsagent's caled"The Red House" which is where Farrier's Close is near. It all brought back memories to me as I walked through the village.

If you had lived somewhere and you went back to it, you know how I feel. But the emotional memory which came back to me had to be seeing our lovely old house where we lived!

It looked so sad standing there with it's lovely courtyard and yellow rose peeking out over the courtyard wall looking sad. I also from where I was standing see the window where my bedroom was, but for a minute, I stood there and dreamed that all of us in the family were back there, having fun and being together, and the best part but made me sad, was the fact I dremed Mum was alive again enjoying the house as she always had it.

That was probably what made me upset visiting the place again, but still I thought of the good memories.
 
Comments:
Hi Katie,

Sorry to hear that you were so upset - it does sound like a lovely place and so full of good memories. I am also sorry that your mother died so young; that's a terrible loss to cope with and you do very well to concentrate on the positive experience of having had such a nice Mum in the first place.

One thing that might help is if you were to take a friend to Codicote and show them around. This way you could talk to someone about everything you remember, but also you would be creating a new memory of that place to look back on, something that has no sense of loss attached to it.
 
Oops, sorry about the deleted post above. Back in again now.

Nice one Katie! I think I'd have been a terrible emotional mess and, if I were in similar circumstances, really don't know if I'd have had the courage to go back to my old house like you did.

I've been telling my mum a lot recently that she's got to count her blessings rather than get mired in anxiety and depression over things. I'm not a great one to talk ... but seems like you've got the right fighting attitude there Katie, innit.

Moving on and up is what life's all about isn't it. No one promises us an easy life ... and my God ain't that true sometimes!

You're strong young Ms Fraser.
 
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